Member-only story
4 Surprising Reasons Why You Let Others Hurt You
No, it’s not because you are weak or flawed…
Once upon a time I was so broken that I saw the whole world around me with shattered lenses. As if I got used to being broken and miserable, I was living a life where hurt and abuse was normal, where pain and tears were expected, where my distorted vision of reality became natural. I got used to being mistreated daily, I was conditioned to endure it and as my feeble attempts of rectifying the situation were met with further abusive events, I learnt my place.
I learnt to silence my instincts, to give up my happiness, to accept what was coming my way — no matter how evil it was. I learnt to live with the pain, accepting it as a chronic, unchangeable and terminal condition that you have to tolerate instead of fighting it. I still found happy moments, I could still smile, I could still move out of my apathy — but eventually, I would fall back for the inertia of my misery was dragging me downwards and wouldn’t let me go.
It was hell, and I didn’t even know it at the time. I knew that relationships are sometimes difficult, challenging, hard and sometimes even painful. I knew I could endure it — I knew I was strong and I had responsibilities. I wasn’t even depressed, I was too busy surviving.
