How to Listen so You Can Really Hear

It’s not about empathy, it’s about discipline

Photo by kyle smith on Unsplash

I recently attended the first in-person business meeting after the pandemic and as much as it was great to see people in real life instead of through screens, it was also eye-opening. I was wondering whether we forgot how to listen.

We were all thrilled to see each other and the discussion was even more heated than usual. Maybe it was about me not being used to in-person discussions after all these months. Maybe it was a difficult situation to conclude these tough times and to define the way forward. Maybe it was just human nature manifested in a condensed way.

I caught myself assisting in conversations where it seemed we forgot how to listen to each other and really hear what the others wanted to say.

As I was sitting there, it eerily reminded me of some discussions my grandparents used to have. My grandma talking to grandpa who replied to something completely different, using some words from her — seemingly missing the point. He claimed that he was a little deaf but to be fair, his hearing was just fine only he conveniently used it when he didn’t want to agree.

It was a ritual between them, a result of 50 years together. Even when they didn’t agree they still agreed and fought only to have something to…