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Self-Care Leaves You With Fewer F*cks to Give
Self-care is not selfish. It’s necessary.
Hi, I’m Zita, a recovering obsessive overthinker. I have been trying to come off overthinking for all my adult life.
I have always been envious of my friend, Anne. She has had the attitude that I have wanted — she cares, but she doesn’t care too much. She can put herself first. She doesn’t stop to worry about what others might think — she does everything in a way that she could benefit from it without hurting others. You might call her selfish, but she is a good kind of selfish. She knows her priorities — and she is always on the top of her list.
I, on the other hand, overthink everything. I care about others and I am willing to put them first. I care about what people think of me and it leaves me overthinking every single thing I say or do. No matter how much I try to act like I don’t care — I do. I care too much. And this is bad.
In trying to always keep others in mind, trying to cater to everyone else’s needs — I forget myself in the process. I have a hard time saying no — because that would collide with my image of being a selfless, caring person. I am always the bigger person, avoiding conflict, generously letting go things that hurt me — only to be able to say that I am better than this. But this is an act. When I…
